Game trailer tries to pull one over on Mark Clayton, fails

Mark Clayton knows that the new trailer for Call of Duty: World at War is wettin' the pants of many a gamer nerd. But Mark Clayton is not fooled. I should know, I'm one of the few receivers to have caught touchdown passes from both Dan Marino and Brett Favre. I can tell when someone's trying to pull the wool over on me. Allow me to make my case. Here's Exhibit A:



Now can anyone tell Mark Clayton what any of this means? What the fuck did I just see that relates to a game that I can actually play? It looks like a cut scene crossed with an MTV special and a soda commercial (what?). I call bullshit! Hey ref, where's my flag? (Don't you know who I am?)

How difficult would it have been to show actual fucking gameplay instead of the cocaine-addled manic stupidity that went into this trailer? Can Mark Clayton make his case without constantly asking rhetorical questions? Yes.

First of all, don't release it as a video called "Four player co-op" if it isn't going to make even the weakest effort to portray that. I see cut scenes, pseudo-slick edits, Hollywood slo-mo cheese, and a bunch of random characters, some of which are described as being players with stupid gamer tags.

JuggaJ: player with stupid gamer tag

There's no continuity in what I'm seeing, I can't tell if the supposed players are fighting Nazis and Americans or other Russians. And for four people playing co-operatively, this video displays about as much teamwork as my 1991 Dolphins, whose 8-8 record precipitated the team's stronghold in mediocrity.

The clip cuts so fast (but not like Mark Clayton on an outside slant) like it actually expects you to go back and freeze frame to understand what any of the split second text information says. The only clear text is at the very beginning, where it tells you that it's supposedly four people playing a campaign mission together. Watching this video in one play through, it looks like there's 14 characters playing as Russians and Germans and Canadians and they're all running around and getting shot at and freeze-framing and blowing up. One more rhetorical question for you: Who can tell?

Fuck this stupid trailer.

Preview Rating: Two crumpled, dirty socks